The "Jaclyn syndrome"

Okay so, I was watching Bachelor Pad, (Yes I'm a hopeless romantic who watches reality shows where people fall in love- I've just realised how cheesy that sounds) Meanwhile... this season, Jaclyn and Ed have partnered up (because challlenges have to be completed in pairs). They do everything together: eat, sleep in the same bed, go on dates, etc. Slowly but surely, Jaclyn starts falling for Ed, he even appears to be sharing the same sentiment because he plays along. Then, one night,Chris Harrison (the presenter) asks Ed if he has a romantic connection with anyone in the house. Ed reveals infront of EVERYONE that he has no intentions of being in a relationship anytime soon and that his sole purpose of being in the competition is to win the money. Obviously, everyone suddenly looks at Jaclyn to see her reaction. It was quite evident that his words had pierced through her in multiple places! Her wounds now exposed, all she managed was a, " I have nothing to say to that." ( At this point: my jaw was on the floor). Later on in the episode, the two win a date to a secluded island and they decide to talk about the previous night. Jaclyn pours her heart out about how she's falling in love with him, and that she was under the impression that he was open to the idea. He tells her that he was still pursuing someone back in his hometown and that he sees her only as a friend and partner in the game. The news brings her to tears. He then goes on to tell her how wonderful and amazing she is, and that any guy would be lucky to have her, blah blah blah... She flashes a smile and ends up allowing him to spend the night with her. (Jaw on the floor again). I mean, how stupid is this girl??? He just blatantly told her that he'll never date her, but after a few romantic nothings- she was willing to jump into bed with him!!!!!

Then it hit me... I've been doing the same thing the last few weeks! I've been such an idiot. I've been telling myself that I accepted the break up but the truth is, I've been holding on. The only way I can really move on, is by cutting him out completely. So far so good. It's only been 4 days, and I'll admit I've dialled his number a few times but I never actually go through with the call. I'm glad I realised I had the "Jaclyn Syndrome" and it took an episode of Bachelor Pad to get myself out of the denial phase and into recovery. I just feel depressed, not just because of the break-up, but everything else that's been happening in my life. Atleast this is the one thing I can safely say, has a way forward!